Core Republican Peasants

 

Sociologists who worried that the United States would never establish a permanent peasant class should look in gratitude to Core Republicans – they’re volunteering.

 

Most folk think being a peasant means wearing a special costume and following ancient life customs. Just look at a gathering of Core Republicans.

 

Suit and tie or jeans and workshirt are the two main male costume groups, and it doesn’t matter which group you’re in as much as it matters that everyone in your group dresses exactly like you do. No exceptions allowed.

 

Core Republican women have a broader (wink! nudge! get it?) choice of costume  but within that spectrum the rule is as ironclad as among the men. No exceptions allowed.

 

Core Republicans balance that wild diversity of dress with an even stricter set of life customs. In common with peasants throughout history, the focus of  customs is to guard against Change.

 

“My father did it this way and his father and his father before him, and I will do the same,” is a mantra that can be applied equally to sowing the fields with manure and reaping the crop at the polls. Just look at the Core Republican harvest in 2006 and 2008. Look for them to do it again in 2010 and 2012, since consistency is to be cherished, whether or not it works.

 

For Core Republicans, the past is never prologue – the past is always present, and it’s that suspicious-looking Future you’ve got to guard against, lest Change get the upper hand.

 

Under stress from the constant attacks of Change, Core Republicans like to chant their traditional mantra:

 

Marriage is between a man and a woman, and it always will be.

 

The invisible hand of the market is what protects us, and it always will be.

 

A traditional family is the only way to raise children, and it always will be.

 

Equal opportunity is just reverse discrimination, and it always will be.

 

Unregulated capitalism is the best economic model, and it always will be.

 

The stimulus package is wrong, and it always will be.

 

Universal, government-backed health care is wrong, and it always will be.

 

Multi-nation diplomacy instead of unilateral aggression is wrong, and it always will be.

 

The mantra goes on forever, but each verse always ends the same way.  For Core Republicans, that’s the core value: Always The Same.

 

That the rest of us in large numbers ignore the mantra only validates it. Just ask the most prominent Core Republicans, including Rush Limbaugh, whose website offers this pearl:” "When you interact with average, ordinary, everyday liberals or Democrats, it's hard not to think, 'My God, the country is finished.'"

 

Apparently taking that to heart, Core Republicans avoid interacting with ordinary, everyday liberals or Democrats, especially when it comes to building workable majorities in Congress. Of course, when you interact, you sometimes have to compromise.

 

And we know what Core Republicans think about compromise, so let’s say it together: “Compromise is bad, and it always will be.

 

So Core Republicans are clearly enthusiastic about becoming the permanent American peasant class.

 

Now if we could only teach them quaint folk dances. . .

 

 

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