Friday, June 16, 2017

Trump Sings Witch-Hunt!



MOSCOW (LBS) -- Barely informed sources say Russian  FSB (ФСБ) services are getting bizarre transmissions from the shower head in the living quarters of the American White House. The latest transmission seems to have President Trump singing new lyrics to Frank Sinatra’s “Witchcraft.”

Puzzled FSB analysts noted their files only have Trump tweeting like a bird, never singing like a canary. “And in shower not even golden?” puzzled one.

Asked for comment on the purported event, American intelligence officials would only say “Are you working for Robert Mueller?”

True to the principles of our motto (We’ve Decided, You Report), LBS offers the text of the transmission without further comment.


Witch-hunt


Fed probers in my hair
(And some get lost in there)
The TV gurus blare
It’s witch-hunt

And I've got no defense for it,
The heat is too intense for it,
What good would common sense for it do?


'Cause it's witch-hunt
Wicked witch-hunt
And although, I know, it's strictly taboo

When they arouse the need in me
My heart says yes indeed in me
I tweet and get myself deeper in goo!

My ego’s steady itch
Keeps rising in its pitch,
So tweeting’s all that I can do

'Cause it's witch-hunt
That crazy witch-hunt
And although, I know, it's strictly taboo

When they arouse the need in me
I tweet ‘cause I believe in me
In spite of all it’s leading me to

Impeachment’s such a bitch.
With tweets so evidence rich,
But tweeting’s just what I gotta do!

###


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