Weekend Tids and Bits

BIKINI-CLAD CAR WASHES AREN’T FOR WISHING, at least not for the Make-A-Wish-Foundation, reports Fox News. Seems like a Washington, DC guy wanted to donate half the take from a weekend bikini car wash to the foundation that grants wishes for kids with terminal illnesses. No thanks, the foundation is reported to have said. Only family-friendly money is acceptable. Unless Disneyland starts stamping tickets “Purchased With Tainted Money,” maybe the very next wish for Make A Wish should be for brains.

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STORMY WEATHER for Stormy Daniels, the porn star considering a U.S. Senate run against David Vitter, the Louisiana incumbent who turned up on a Washington madam’s list, and we’re not talking groceries. Daniels, whose real name is Stephanie Gregory Clifford, was arrested in Tampa, FL for slugging her husband in a dispute over laundry and bills. Earlier, the car of one of her political advisors exploded – whether with help or not isn’t clear. What all this does for the political future of someone who starred in films with minimal costume budgets isn’t clear.

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HARRY POTTER AND THE GET-A-LIFE DEMONS might be a good title for a movie pitting the young wizard against those who are distressed that the adolescents in the current movie are shown in pubs. Harry Potter and The Half-Blood Prince shows characters ordering butterbeer – alcoholic content unknown – and other drinking-associated shots. Although it’s legal for youngsters of 16 in Britain to order alcohol with food, much tut-tutting was reported in the New York Times.

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“OBVIES” AWARD NEEDED, which would be an award given to studies, reports and findings of the obvious. If we can come up with a process, a study by Virginia Tech’s Transportation Institute would be a top candidate. It found that texting while driving is lots more dangerous than talking while driving. That prompted introduction of legislation in the U.S. Senate that would cut off federal highway funds for states who didn’t crack down on texting while driving. No word yet on studies about sleeping while driving, bombed-out-of-your-mind while driving, sex while driving or other behaviors that might pose danger while hurtling down the highway at average-IQ-in-miles-per-hour-rates.

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Last Week’s Lessons:

n Machine intelligence still has a long way to go before it can match many achievements of human intelligence. Problem: scientists can’t make the damned things dumb enough. See http://larryblaskosaid.blogspot.com/2009/07/intelligent-machines-not-to-worry.html

n Mortal Baby Boomers? Disturbing thoughts that the self-proclaimed inventors of sex, drugs, rebellion and living forever may die anyway at http://larryblaskosaid.blogspot.com/2009/07/shocking-baby-boomers-mortal-world.html

n Kidney Punch To Capitalism when a broker is arrested for bringing a willing seller and a willing buyer together at http://larryblaskosaid.blogspot.com/2009/07/capitalism-update-no-love-for-sale-but.html

n South Carolina Sex Scandal Focus shifts from Governor Mark Sanford to man accused of buggery with a 21-year-old horse named Sugar. No word from state’s supporters on whether they welcome this shift from dalliance in Argentina to making strictly domestic hay at http://larryblaskosaid.blogspot.com/2009/07/another-sc-sex-scandal-horsing-around.html

n A Solution At Last to the Gun Debate is offered in a proposed “Must-Carry” movement that ties carrying weapons to voting with a “Wanna Vote? Gotta Tote!” slogan at http://larryblaskosaid.blogspot.com/2009/07/wanna-vote-gotta-tote-must-carry-rules.html

Have a great weekend!

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Weekend Tids and Bits

FLY INCIDENT STILL BUZZING -- It seems the fly unfortunate enough to fatally annoy the First Swatter in a CNBC interview isn’t an isolated incident. The New York Times reported last week that the Obama White House is infested with flies. Sources in the Agriculture Department who requested anonymity to remain employed suggest that any large concentration of manure is bound to be a fly magnet.

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HARDLY AN EXPLOSIVE ISSUE -- The AP reports that a couple of lawsuits have been filed against propane gas companies who are accused of putting less than 20 pounds of propane in the tanks that fuel backyard grills. The explanation offered was that putting less propane in the tanks was a way to deal with last summer’s fuel costs. A quick backyard check here showed both fuel tanks from FerrellGas, one of the companies named in the suit, were clearly labeled as containing only 15 pounds of propane. The real damage is mostly to one aging Baby Boomer’s ego. The old guy had been congratulating himself that he could still handle a full 20-pound tank one-handed.

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NOT HALF BAD --The Guardian reported that an analyst told Parliament that half of Britain’s local and regional newspapers could be shut down within the next five years. Revenue that’s already declined by half gets the blame. Mirroring their U.S. counterparts, newspaper executives whined about the recession and changes in technology. No word in the story of any MP expressing outrage or even interest.

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NO BOYS ALLOWED – or wannabe Supreme Court Justices either it seems. Supreme Court nominee Sonia Sotomayor resigned from the Belizean Grove after Republican senators questioned her membership in the exclusive women-only group. While the Senate itself used to be a mostly all-male bastion, the current Senate has 17 females, four of whom are Republican. You know you’re in trouble when a Republican Senator has the high ground on diversity.

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BRIDGING THE GENERATION GAP – Actually, maybe floating over it. Polls showing something like half of the adults in America would legalize pot. That lights up common ground between today’s college students and their aging Baby Boomer parents. Both groups tend to be for legalization, although there was concern about adolescent pot use, which would then join adolescent drinking, tobacco and sex on the list of things parents themselves did but now counsel against.

LAST WEEK’S DISCUSSIONS:

n Alaska’s Gov. Sarah Palin and Louisiana’s porn star Senator Wannabe Stormy Daniels could be a 2012 Republican Dream Ticket at http://larryblaskosaid.blogspot.com/2009/06/gov.html

n The recession must be ending because the political But Birds now have the time for English-only nonsense at http://larryblaskosaid.blogspot.com/2009/06/recession-must-be-ending-springtime-for.html

n The cross-border trade of guns and drugs between Mexico and the U.S. is blooming, so the Customs and Border Protection folk are going to get tough – on pocket knives at http://larryblaskosaid.blogspot.com/2009/06/customs-and-border-protection-cutting.html

n Newspaper consultants are telling their nervous employers that the way to make money in a nation of nymphomaniacs is to open a brothel at http://larryblaskosaid.blogspot.com/2009/06/newspapers-and-nymphos-dying-newspapers.html

n Why do we need to know whether or not the employees of Brooksville, FL, are wearing underwear at work? See http://larryblaskosaid.blogspot.com/2009/06/internet-tower-of-babel-informed.html

Happy Fathers Day!

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Gov. Go Go and Sen. Stormy –

Steele’s 2012 GOP Dream Ticket?

Republican National Committee Chairman Michael Steele has the unenviable task of shepherding two candidates into what figures to be the 2012 model Obama Republican Shredder, unless he strips away his blinders and sees a winning ticket as Mother Nature made one.

If he keeps the blinders, he’ll only see the likes of Newt Gingrich, Rush Limbaugh, Mitt Romney and Mike Huckabee, to name a few. But if he sheds those blinders, he’ll see the greatest Republican national ticket since Reagan-Bush.

The pulsing, throbbing political passions these two candidates inspire are guaranteed to arouse the Republican base.

We refer of course to a Republican 2012 presidential ticket of Alaska’s Gov. Sarah Palin and the person many in politics call a real comer, Stormy Daniels, who has an exploratory committee looking at a 2010 race against Louisiana’s Republican Sen. David Vitter.

Governor Palin’s candidacy speaks for itself, which is fortunate since her speaking performance as Senator John McCain’s running mate got mixed reviews. But it introduced her to the national stage you betcha. Her ability to balance the Golden Ager at the top of the ticket with the Miracle of Life provided by her unwed pregnant daughter, all the while keeping an eye on Russia across the Bering Strait and shopping at Saks Fifth Avenue made her the stuff of legend.

Rather than being cowed by national media milking the issues of unprotected sex and Saks, she became the go-to person for lively quotes in the McCain campaign, a Governor Go Go on the national stage.

Ms. Daniels is a veteran of films noted for exceptional wardrobe cost control. She brings excellent face recognition to the ticket, with similar results on all body parts. Although some questioned whether a star of porno flicks could perform in the United States Senate, supporters said her experience and the long list of Senators caught with their pants down would be a good fit.

Ms. Daniels film positions are many and well recorded. For others, she has a forthcoming book, according to her exploratory committee’s website, “Stormblazer! Stormy Daniels and the Triumph of Responsibility.” Her exploratory website splash page doesn’t declare a party affiliation.

As he considers the implications of a ticket featuring Palin and Daniels, Steele’s job is probably made easier by recalling that while Daniels is comfortable on top, she doesn’t need to be there to perform well.

The wide-appeal fundraising possibilities alone of a Palin-Daniels ticket make it worthy of serious consideration. Donors could be offered a chance to explore field dressing or undressing with each candidate demonstrating their particular skills.

It’s not known whether anyone has approached RNC Chairman Steele with these ideas before. The Republican National Committee website splash page informs us that “Chairman Steele is listening to social media,” so anything is possible, including Republican wins in 2010 and the big one in 2012.

You betcha.

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Weekend Tids and Bits

 

 

Pravda and RNC Agree On America’s Direction – The Republican National Committee took some heat for calling the Democrats socialists, but they’ve been vindicated by no less an authority than the online edition of Pravda, the famed Russian daily. Stanislav Mishin writes on May 29 that “It must be said, that like the breaking of a great dam, the American decent into Marxism is happening with breath taking speed, against the back drop of a passive, hapless sheeple, excuse me dear reader, I meant people.” You can catch more from conservative Republicanism’s  apparent new soulmate at:

http://english.pravda.ru/opinion/columnists/107459-1/

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Never Lie to Liars might be advice former New York City Police Commissioner Bernard Kerik would find interesting. He’s been indicted by a Washington, D.C. federal grand jury for lying to Bush White House officials who were considering him for secretary of the Department of Homeland Security. Kerik’s lawyer says his client is innocent. Some speculate the alleged lies were discovered as part of a routine Bush White House search for weapons of mass destruction.

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Clever, Those Open Meetings Advocates – One of the newspaper heavyweights who showed up at a non-publicized  meeting in Chicago’s O’Hare Hilton to talk about “Models to Lawfully Monetize Content” on the web was quoted in Editor & Publisher as saying the meeting wasn’t secret because a sign on the hotel room door said “NAA Meeting.” That could clearly identify it as a meeting of the nation’s top newspaper brass under the umbrella of Newspaper Association of America, with headquarters on Wilson Boulevard in Arlington, VA. Of course, it could also identify a meeting of the National Apartment Association (NAA) also with headquarters on Wilson Boulevard in Arlington, VA. Or the National Auctioneers Association (NAA), Overland Park, KS., or the National Aeronautic Association  (NAA) of Washington, D.C., or. . .

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Full and Complete Disclosure And Then Some continues to come to Louisiana politics with the latest announcement by porn star Stormy Daniels that she’s formed an exploratory committee to gauge interest for a possible run against U.S. Senator David Vitter. She’s currently on a listening tour. Political insiders wonder whether or not a possible Senate run would falter on face recognition, since that’s the potential candidate’s least-photographed feature.

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Plunging Into Stormy Waters

 

When the gods of politics are feeling cranky, they take it out on Louisiana. Just look at the recent track record.

 

Republican Gov. Bobby Jindal’s response to President Obama’s first Congressional address was an opportunity for Jindal to establish himself on the national stage. He did. He established himself as having watched the late children’s TV star Mr. Rogers way too many times.

 

Senator David Vitter, another Republican, had his moment in the sunshine when his phone number turned up in the 2007 client list offered by the “D.C. Madam.” First elected to Congress replacing Rep. Robert Livingston whose quest to become Speaker was torpedoed by an adultery scandal, Vitter admitted to “serious sin” and said he had sought forgiveness from God and his wife.

 

He apparently got forgiveness from at least his wife, in spite of her earlier being quoted by CBS News during the Clinton/Lewinsky mess as saying "I'm a lot more like Lorena Bobbitt than Hillary. If he (Vitter) does something like that, I'm walking away with one thing, and it's not alimony, trust me."

 

Lorena Bobbitt, students of high-level journalism will recall, addressed problems in her marriage by using a carving knife on her husband’s penis. Apparently still intact, Vitter is running for reelection next year and perhaps facing Stormy Waters.

 

Stormy Waters, also known as Stormy Daniels, is a porn actress and director of note, and while not affiliated with a political party, is featured on a website http://draftstormy.com, which says she will be on a listening tour in Louisiana next week about a possible Senate run. The Baton Rouge native’s possible political ambition has already been the subject of several media interviews.

 

All of which may or may not be a publicity stunt, but those who have followed Stormy Daniels’  film career are certainly familiar with all of her many positions and can testify that she has absolutely nothing to hide. Given her background, Daniels running against Vitter in a Republican primary would keep memories of his own scandal standing tall.

 

The draftstormy.com website goes out of its way to say it’s not authorized either by Daniels or the company that produces her movies. Whois lists the registrant, administrator, technical and billing contacts for the site as 1 & 1 Internet, Inc., of Chesterbrook, PA.

 

Citizens of the Pelican state will certainly not lack for all the political entertainment their collective beak can hold.

 

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